This is brilliant!

Twitter: The Criterion Collection

What if Twitter… came to life?

We asked some of our friends to film their favorite tweets. We didn’t care how they did it. They could read it. They could act it. They could do it with puppets. Whatever they wanted. The only rules were it had to be a tweet written by someone else and it had to contain the entire tweet and nothing but the tweet.

This is what they gave us.

We hope you enjoy it.

@poeks & @sween

Well done, you two.
via yourmonkeycalled.com

You have to read this post from Tremendous News. Brilliant. Like those mass forward emails, but with pictures! and more in-tune with my generation…

Save for the ‘Roll Up The Rim’ Tim Horton’s campaign I’ve either said or recognize these statements from my family. I missed the memo on winning from Timmys, must also be a product of the fact I NEVER go home during the winter unless it’s Christmas-time.

Also, you aren’t a fully formed adult unless you’ve sat through an episode of Mr. Dressup and get excited to see what he pulled out of his Tickle Trunk.

1. We Are Completely Comfortable With The Term “Homo Milk”.

In Canada, this is an acceptable type of milk.  I remember when someone asked my mom what type of milk she gave me as a child.  I braced myself for a devastating mental image.

He loves homo.

Thanks, mom.

Because that’s not confusing.

2. We Correct You When You Say “Soda”.

We’ll say, “you mean pop?”.  And then creepily stare at you until you call it ‘pop’.

3. We Are Offended When You Ask Us If We Know A Friend Of Yours Who, Coincidentally, Also Lives In Canada.

You’re from Canada?  Do you know my friend Tom?  He lives in Canada too.

Ever since Canada was invented, we’ve been asked this question.  The American soldiers did this during the War of 1812.

Good war, dude.  Good war.  I think my buddy Jacques lives up in Canada.  Vancouver or some shit.  Tall guy, eyepiece?  You probably know him.

4. We Don’t Think “Legalizing Marijuana” Is A Debate.

I’ve never met a Canadian with another view on it.

Or I might have, but I was watching Garfield 2 while eating cookie dough.

Odie’s a bad ass.

5. We’ve All Rolled Up The Rim To Win.

Ask any Canadian you know if they’ve ‘rolled up the rim’.

They’ll say yes.

It’s not naughty.  It’s way lamer than that.  It’s a contest that a coffee shop ..

Actually fuck it.

It’s naughty.

6. We’ve Been Jealous Of Someone Else’s Toboggan.

A ‘toboggan’ is a nice wooden snow sled.

When I grew up, I had to go sledding using the lid of a garbage can.

So maybe this one’s just for me.

7. We Think ‘Beaver Tail’ Is Delicious.

A beaver tail is a pastry, covered in syrup, ice cream, cream, and some fruit that we pick off it because it’s all gross and healthy.

8. Our Parents Have Tied Our Mittens Together With A String So We Don’t Lose Them.

My mom would tie my “wool gloves” together and put them through my winter jacket so I didn’t lose them.

This seemed like a good idea.

But since they were pink and I was a freaking boy, mom I doubt they’d go unnoticed.

9. We Were Raised, In Part, By Mr. Dressup.

I’m twenty-nine, so this might not be true of older Canadians.  Or like, super hot college chicks who think I’m all old and gross now because they don’t know who Mr Dressup is.

Mr Dressup sawed through the hearts of many Canadian kids.

10. We Grow Playoff Beards.  (Not The Women)  (Hopefully)

During hockey playoffs, players will not shave.  So when they win the Stanley Cup, it looks like Hamas is playing for the New Jersey Devils.

For some bizarre reason, some fans who support the team, decide to grow beards too.

Don’t ask.

I look like I’m in Hamas even in the off season.

11. We Are Angry That We Can’t Watch The Same Commercials As Americans During The Superbowl.

Instead of the cool commercials everyone talks about, we get “Tom Ford’s Nissan Dealership, Now Open In Bolton”.

Your name’s Tom Ford, douchebag.

Pick the right car company.

12. We Know Where To Get Good Poutine.

Because it is the nectar of our people.

–

For the last three, I asked some friends of Tremendous News for help.  Here they are.

13. When We Hear “In The Five-hole” And “Spending Some Time In The Box”, We Don’t Think Dirty.

It’s hockey.  It’s pure.  It’s our game.

Alex Ruiz, Calgary Flames TV.

14. We Give Directions Using Liquor Stores And Beer Stores As Geographical Benchmarks.

Ok, you know the beer store at Jane and Dundas? Go east until you get to the liquor store then take a right.

Jeff Marek, Hockey Night In Canada Radio.

15. Canadians Never Think Anywhere Is Cold Outside Of Canada

Whaaaa? This isn’t cold. Winter of ‘94, my eyelids froze shut, and I still walked to school.

Nia Vardalos, Actress, Screenwriter, My Big Fat Greek Wedding, My Life In Ruins

–

There you have it.

Send this to a Canadian friend to see how many of these things they can relate to.

You can follow me on Twitter here.  Let me know if you have any friends in Canada.

I was probably jealous of their toboggans.

via tremendousnews.com